closer to fine

i can finally stop feeling like i've been put into storage for the season, and start toasting the future:
the job interview i had last week left me feeling so positive, and so enthusiastic, that even the substantially "irregular" shifts involved - and the major commuting - couldn't keep me from accepting...with delight.
i start october first, which gives me time to aquaint myself with a few new/old
cameras, and to enjoy the europephotobloggers meetup at the end of september in
london (you, too?).
my cup runneth over.

out on a limb

"curious people are interesting people, i wonder why that is?"
- bill maher (american comedian, actor, writer and producer, b.1956)

i understand the term "pear-shaped", as used when life - ah, life! - goes slightly awry.
but i wonder, sometimes, what one calls life-going-well.
banana-shaped?
apple-shaped?
when i have things on my mind, like i do right now, i ponder the silliest things.

that is the question

when i am asked, "what do you miss most about canada?", i always answer "kraft macaroni & cheese dinner".
but i jest, of course i jest. i miss my family most of all, and then i miss kraft macaroni
& cheese dinner. but i also miss things like maple syrup, and browsable bookstores, and chips with gravy, and, especially, space.
a few weeks ago, we viewed - at my quiet insistence - a house-for-sale, and it had space.
well, i saw space: a kitchen large enough for a table and chairs, a generous study, bedrooms aplenty, endless storage, and nothing - oh joy, oh bliss - attached.
my husband saw, above all, chores: a roof that needed repair, a floor that demanded replacement, a lot of plastic panelling, fake brickwork and definitely-not-us colours that would grate, aesthetically, very quickly.
i fell in love, despite, and envisioned myself getting old(er) there; he envisioned
himself sanding and sawing to kingdom come.
*
sometimes twains meet; sometimes they don't. we'll see.

and stretch and bend

weight-watching can be, in the long run, a frustrating business, once your constitution has recovered from the eek-what's-with-all-this-healthy-food shock and reached the inevitable this-far-and-no-further plateau.
a mirror like this (we call it a "lachspiegel" - a "smile mirror", but rachel and i,
when we discussed it, could not for the life of us remember what its actual name is) can offer welcome, if slightly misleading, encouragement.
and the aforementioned smile, of course.

a sentimental journey

my husband clocked his early kilometers in a rickety citroën ami, and yesterday, when our sunday drive took us to ijmuiden harbour, where dozens of citroën afficionados were queuing for the newcastle ferry (some kind of get-together in great britain), this aging beauty caught his eye and - bless his usually unsentimental soul - he sighed.
audibly.
i gather - i don't drive, so i wouldn't know - that one's first-ever car cruises into a spot in one's heart and parks there forever.

ready for the rain

"the trouble with weather forecasting is that it's right too often for us to ignore it and wrong too often for us to rely on it."
- patrick young

the skies here have been inscrutable lately: sunny and serene one moment, glowering and aggressive - teemingly so - the next.
preparing for a day out and about has become an art.

many springs gone by

my daughter, my lovely daughter, with her anxious heart and her adventurous soul, turns twenty-three today.
i wish her - now, always - happiness, prosperity and peace of mind, but also: faith in herself, patience with life's imperfections, and the confidence and courage to continue pursuing her dreams.
*
gefeliciteerd, marieke!

to distraction

i haven't been (very) busy, nor have i been (very) ill, but i have been (very) absent, i know, and this (very) ordinary image is part of my excuse.
last sunday, after a dinner with dear friends, i came home with an unexpected
purchase: a large black trunk of excellent, and venerable, photographic gear - a couple of cameras, some lenses, and accessories, all of it around 30 years old, most of it in mint condition.
i've spent the whole week - natuurlijk - trying things out (it's been ages since i last owned an SLR) and this is one of the test results.
it works: i am so pleased...and, stuck in the routine monotony of unemployment, so ready for a bit of a new challenge.

the day after yesterday

"the world is too dangerous for anything but truth and too small for anything but love."
- william sloan coffin

my loved ones in london are allright.
i hope and pray that yours are, too.
****
sometimes i wonder: did i bear my children into a world of fear and uncertainty? and that mere thought makes me fearful and uncertain.
and sad.

non sequitur

someday, somewhere - inevitably - they will meet, and they will be near and imperfect strangers, pausing awkwardly, a hesitant handshake apart, and passing the time of
day, of months, of years, of a heart's age.
the distance between them will be peculiar and profound; no confidences will be shared, no explanations made, and no hurts healed: since the sweet sequence of their story was interrupted, simply too much time has passed.